these are my children.

i love them to death. its hard to explain the love a parent has for a child. being able to experience being a child and also being a mother to a child, the attachment between a parent and child is so much stronger. many may believe that im wrong because they love their parents unconditionally and they feel the same sensitivity and over protection as a parent would towards their child. i dont deny you can feel that way, im sure many feel that way but when you have children of your own, its like you discover a love you never new existed. your time is spent thinking about them 24/7, a single cry hits you directly at your heart and the what if's begin to make you wonder about the many possibilities of what and what is not the best for them.

i try my best to keep these two happy. sometimes, its really good to take that in consideration. my problem i find at times is that because i love them so much, i have a difficult time trying to discipline them. i was raised to have a soft heart, and so i have become soft hearted, not only that, it takes a lot for me to actually get angry at them. i dont want them to grow up lazy or immoral but i dont want to them to grow up hating me for being so strict. ive been trying my best to balance out myself as a mother.

its not easy to understand,
i dont expect anyone to.